28 Sep 2010 9 am eastern

Blood and Bone

Jeffrey Zeldman Presents

MY EX-WIFE is one of my heroes. Six years ago today, during 33 hours of labor in a stiflingly hot room, she brought forth our daughter. When my body rebels in the gym, I think of her courage and push out another rep. When a lift or stretch hurts, I remember what she did and breathe through the pain. From her and those long moments, I learned mind over matter. From witnessing and helping during those 33 hours, I learned that life is blood and bone, and that we can achieve anything if we push hard enough.

Thank you, Carrie, for that lesson and for this girl. Happy sixth birthday, dearest Ava. And, by wonderful coincidence and similar courage and marvels, joyous first day on earth, Nash Thomas Hoy. Fill your lungs and holler, boy!

Filed under: family, glamorous, The Essentials

18 Responses to “Blood and Bone”

  1. Ethan said on

    This is beautiful, Jeffrey.

    The happiest of happy birthdays to Ava and Nash. The world is better for having them in it.

  2. John Sundman said on

    Well said.

    Congratulations to all. Including you, for your own courage.

    And now I will try to push harder today to achieve what I need to achieve.

  3. Stephane Deschamps said on

    Yeah, same here. My girlfriend gave birth twice, and all the while I was thinking that if I had had to do that, I wouldn’t have wanted children.

    Happy day to you all.

  4. Brian K. James said on

    Every so often, I read something that makes me stop, and really think. This was definitely worth the read, and I appreciate my own Mother even more. She’s trying to get things done, and I’m trying to help as best as I can. I too, will now push harder, as in the long run — and no one knows for sure how long — it will pay off. This has always been true.

    At my job I wear a lanyard, with my name on it. But, I’ve inserted a fortune from a fortune cookie I had. I’ve saved them for years, but this one, is one that I have NEVER gotten two of… yet.

    “When seeking success, look first to yourself.”

    Oh, how true. And with your post, you’ve amplified this.

    Thank you Mr. Zeldman. I will make today a great day, and this life an even better life because of your inspiring words.

    Brian K. James

  5. Billee D. said on

    Beautiful. Happy Birthday, Ava and Nash!

  6. Carrie said on

    Thanks, Jeffrey.

  7. Kevin Sharon said on

    The serendipity is truly amazing. Happy birthday to Ava and Nash, you both have wonderful parents!

  8. Anthony Stauffer said on

    Beautifully said.

  9. Sergio Acosta said on

    Thanks, Jeffrey, for sharing this. It really inspires.

  10. Whitney Hess said on

    Beautifully said, Jeffrey. Happy birthday to Ava and happy birth to Nash!

  11. Jennifer said on

    Beautiful and touching.

  12. David Moffitt said on

    Thank you so much for sharing this, Jeffrey – it really made my day (as did your antics on Twitter about Ava’s backpack and of course cupcakes)!

  13. Kevin said on

    That has to be one of the best things I’ve read today. Just beautiful.

    Happy birthday Ava and Nash. You both have great parents.

  14. Jon Williams said on

    The way you’ve navigated through this, the things you’ve chosen to share, have been a great, ongoing source of inspiration to me. It’s been like having a scout for the treacherous emotional landscape ahead. Thanks once again.

  15. Leandro said on

    Beautiful. Thank you.

  16. Nagarjun said on

    Jeffrey, the best birthday gift you can give Ava is getting back together with Carrie. Indeed, Ava deserves nothing less.

    Clearly you have a great deal of respect for Carrie, and I’m sure she does as well. Is it not your duty to put aside your differences for your daughter’s sake? How can your differences be insurmountable when the respect remains?

    I come from a different culture to you, but recognise the above may sound judgmental and offensive. Be assured though, Jeffrey, that it’s not the case – I’ve read your site since 1999, wept when your mother went, rejoiced when you got married and had Ava, and wept again when you and Carrie went separate ways. I consider it my duty to urge you to do what I believe is the right thing to do – if you do not, I fear you will regret it years later.

  17. Marianne McDougall said on

    Thank you very much for sharing this, Jeffrey – it is a very beautiful story and so touching.

  18. David Humes said on

    Yet another example of why life is sweet and amazing! You inspire so much not only in the realm of design but in the intimate confines of life. Thanks Jeffrey!

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