I am sad that my five-year-old wrote on our door in permanent marker. She knows better. I’m proud that she is learning to write. And that she chose to write these two words—her name and mine.
When she showed me her work, I had a choice: reprimand her for writing on the door. Or tell her proud I am of her.
I think you can guess which I chose.
Happy Thanksgiving, Americanos!
Short URL: zeldman.com/?p=3096
Filed under: glamorous
Yahoo! design lead Luke W shows how form design impacts user behavior at An Event Apart. Photo © foltzwerk.
In ALA No. 302: in E-book formats, HTML wins. On websites, it's not so simple. Joe Clark and Dan Mall rock the format wars.
Happy Cog™ designs Amanda Project, social media network, writing project, and book series combined.
Improve your markup. Validate HTML, CSS, microformats for single pages or entire sites. Get advice on page structure, headings, ID, class, and more.
The tantalizing promise of “real fonts” on the web runs smack into a lumbering mammoth. Real Fonts and Rendering: The New Elephant in the Room.
Create search-friendly sites that load faster, reach more users, and cost less to design, update, and maintain. Read about the third edition, now in stores.
Copyright © 1995–2010 L. Jeffrey Zeldman. Made in New York City. Powered by WordPress and Media Temple.
ISSN #1534-0309. About, Contact, Desktops, Subscribe (RSS). Choose dark orange or off-white color scheme.
Jeffery – You should place a small frame around it.
That is a very adorable conundrum.
Much better penmanship than I had at that age.
Heck, it’s about par with my penmanship today.
I’m going on a tangent here, but the word “penmanship” seems really weird after I’ve typed it a couple of times. It’s like some sort of naval vessel for carrying office supplies.
We had the same thing happen with our son as he started learning to write. We bought him a chalkboard/whiteboard from Ikea and it helped him greatly.
Its great to have these little glimpses into your life Mr. Zeldman. Thanks for sharing.
That’s adorable! And I’m so lifted by your response to it, definitely frame it!
This made me so happy. There are always two choices for every decision. You’ve obviously chosen the correct one. Yay love and life! :)
Ummm… both? I find that teachable moments are often found in sweetly complex circumstances.
@Chris J. Davis:
:D The new chalkboard is 20 feet away from the door. But, you know, kids.
@Bill Bergmann:
Wise advice, sir. Thank you.
Nice conundrum. My little boy, Freddie, is five and like @Chris J. Davis a chalkboard is proving it’s worth.
The frame idea is very good too.
If you visit my blog (link above) search petition as I need help with one (UK residents only). Many thanks.
R!
I am @isemann on Twitter.
My nephew has the same issue with painting on himself and furniture. “On the paper! On the paper!” is almost as frequent as, “Gentle! Gentle!”
That door is now a monument to priorities. Happy Thanksgiving, Jeffrey.
Social comments and analytics for this post…
This post was mentioned on Twitter by zeldman: I had a choice: reprimand her for writing on the door. Or tell her proud I am of her. http://www.zeldman.com/?p=3096…
You sound like a gracious father. I admire you for thinking before just reacting.
Sometimes. Not often enough. Thanks, Chad.
That’s really what it is to be a dad isn’t it?
We can see you love Ava with all your heart, Jeffery. That makes a great dad.
I carved my name into my parents’ wood dresser back in the day. I might have been around five. At first I was reprimanded but later praised at my talents. I am now a professional artist. I guess the reprimand temporarily stopped me from creating art on family furniture.
Frame it. It is and always will be very special :)
my son draw a face on his door. I didn’t congratulate him. I tried erasing it with a chemical, and it just removed the varnish. the drawing is still there!
I meant “drew”
I agree that putting a frame around it would give it the prominence it deserves!
Happy Thanksgiving to you, Ava and the rest of your family and friends!
We’ve gone through this mostly with our 6yo, who at some point started writing his siblings names on walls in an apparent effort to deflect the blame. The problem for him is that his 12yo brother was obviously not doing it and his 4yo sister had no writing skills. We’ve tried to go with “Great job on the writing buddy, very neat. Next time though, let’s write on paper.”
What to do, what to do! My daughter, Ava as well, is five too and she is writing on everything she can get her hands on. It takes her just a couple days to fill a whole grammar notebook with doodles and spelling. When you are faced with that situation, it is tough to ponder your choices. The artist in you wants to say, “That is awsome, perfect x-height!” The family handyman in you wants to say, “what in the world were you thinking!” I think you made the right choice!
My brother and I drew all over the back of my great-grandmother’s chair using an assortment of crayons. My mother was quite distraught over it at the time. But she didn’t go crazy about it or anything.
If you recall from Randy Pausch’s last lecture he told everyone that he painted an elevator door, a submarine and mathematical formulas on his bedroom walls. His parents let him do it, encouraging his creativity.
To this day those drawings and creativity are still on his old bedroom walls. And while I don’t have any children of my own I’d like to think that someday I could say to them “It’s your room, decorate it any way you want to.”
Frame it! And commission some erstwhile font designer to make a font from it. Millions x better than comic sans!
[...] had a choice: reprimand her for writing on the door. Or tell her proud I am of her. http://www.zeldman.com/?p=3096 zeldman (Jeffrey Zeldman)1 hour, 25 minutes agoView original [...]
Jeff,
You must feel invincible today. =)
Awesome little story.
Happy Thanksgiving to you too!
You definitely took the correct action.
One day, too soon, she will be 17 and a happy memory of the time she wrote on the wall will be a lovely thing to recall. And by then she may be looking at a degree in typography, I’d say the writing’s on the wall.
So Im guessing you punished her? No water for the day? That’s how we do it for minor infractions in my house.
I might be a crummy father, but gosh darn it the salad fork goes on the left!
[...] breaking news across the technology sector. We are still in Alpha, so please bear with us. PrideJeffrey Zeldman Presents 4 hours ago I am sad that my five-year-old wrote on our door in [...]
I love it. After I said no to something my 6yo son wanted, he drew a stick picture of himself crying and wrote, “This is me”–and taped it on the front door of our apartment! I was so proud of his powers of self-expression I left it up–until I realized some neighbors might think I was actually abusing him.
p.s. Said son is now going on 22, and is an aspiring comic book artist. Of course.
[...] [...]
There was a time when we moved into a new apartment and my parents were making holes on the walls to hang paintings, shelves, etc.
One day, they arrived from work and I had made a huge hole on the wall. My suggestion was they could use it to hang some nice painting from it :D
I’m rather intrigued at the design of those two words. I think there’s more art in that writing than most might give credit for. And the symmetry of the names and all.
This sounds so much like what my husband did! When our 2 year old started doodling on our walls, I was livid. But my husband had a completely different perspective and this is what he has to say…”First sign of Picasso influences. May be it’s just a proud parent, but the doodles don’t appear totally random to me. Taken with the fan (top-left corner), they could pass for Japanese characters…And they look rather nice on our living room wall too. ”
Here’s the pic
http://www.flickr.com/photos/nagarjun/337100222/
When I was very young, I drew with pencil on a wooden model car my Grandfather had given me. “I <3 Mom."
She scolded me. I was disheartened.
[...] @zeldman: I had a choice: reprimand her for writing on the door. Or tell her proud I am of her. http://www.zeldman.com/?p=3096 [...]
Jeffrey, she turned black ink into gold.
This is what it’s all about.
[...] такава!иди ми дойди ми – българинът от бъдещетоPrideoptimiced | en » “$400 for a logo?”Пиян морковQuirksBlog: Native iPhone apps vs. Web [...]
You could make it the door of progress. Stand her against it, and mark her height, do it again every 6 months.
[...] Pride (zeldman.com) [...]
Maybe there is something wrong with you that something like this would make you sad. Children do that, and its OK, its also OK to show them that this is not the appropriate way to express themselves, that is, on the doors and walls. Now if you had said that she had drawn on every wall in the house despite your requesting her not to, OK, I understand that you would be sad, but hopefully directed in the right place, at yourself for having brought her up to be like that.
Our children are our mirror, or, at least, that is what I would like to think:
http://www.taiyo.ws/taiyo07.html
onno
[...] Pride I am sad that my five-year-old wrote on our door in permanent marker. She knows better. I’m proud that she is learning to write. And that she chose to write these two words—her name and mine. When she showed me her work, I had a choice: reprimand her for writing on the door. Or tell her [...] [...]
Also, writing over it with a dry-erase marker will take the permanent marker right off, depending on the surface.
Spray paint is next! (They call themselves “writers”)
Has there anyone a natural feel for good kerning ;-)
so how did you managed to remove it? I used rubbing alcohol( isopropyl) everytime my kids write on the wall.. I think that’s where the artistic skills begin ☺
[...] [...]